Welcome to France, Mes Amis!
by x-silverstorm-x
Summary: When the Host Club decides to go to France for three weeks during the summer holidays to visit Tamaki's mom, Haruhi gets dragged along. As usual, some cough cough of the hosts are up to mischief. Can Haruhi survive this Odyssey? TamaHaru :
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: Not mine, never mine, and will never be mine.

"No, I do not want to go, have never wanted to go, and will not ever want to!" Haruhi Fujioka said, crossing her arms.

"But why, Haru-chan?" Mitsukuni "Hunny" Haninozuka asked, his big soulful brown eyes wider than ever as he asked her that question. He cradled Usa-chan, his stuffed rabbit, and smiled winningly, adding, "It'd be the greatest holiday if you would come!"

"Yeah, Haruhi, don't spoil our fun," Hikaru Hitachiin said, leaning against his twin brother, Kaoru.

"Fun?" Haruhi asked suspiciously. "Define your idea of _fun_."

"For starters, milord will surely go crazy if you came…" Kaoru began.

"…And teasing him would make up three quarters of the fun already," Hikaru ended, and the twins grinned at each other. Evilly.

Haruhi had on a look which plainly said, "this does not convince me at all."

"Oh please," Hunny senpai begged, pouting for the cute effect.

"I'm fine with a short holiday, you know," Haruhi said, "but three weeks! In France! Really, wouldn't that be too much?"

"Well, you were fine with it in Karuizawa," Kyouya Ootori said, scribbling something in his notebook as always. He looked up, snapping the notebook shut. "You stayed there… let's see... about a month, I think."

"But that was because it was a part-time job!" Haruhi protested. And then adding under her breath, "And it was because I thought you guys wouldn't be around. Having a holiday with you guys… it wouldn't be called a holiday."

"Hm?" Kaoru asked. "What was that?"

"Er… nothing!" Haruhi laughed airily. "Well, I was just saying it was because of a part-time job, that's why I stayed there for a month."

"Well, maybe you should just pretend that having fun is a job," Tamaki Suou suggested, smiling. "If you want, my daughter, I could pay you by the hour too."

"Th-that's not what I mean-" Haruhi started to say, but she was cut off by the rest (well, by Hunny, Tamaki and the twins, anyway) celebrating.

"Yay! Haru-chan's coming to France!" Hunny cheered, bouncing all about the room happily, and then discarding Usa-chan on the sofa and grabbing Haruhi's hands, making her bounce about the room with him. The twins were slapping hi-fives and turning to look at Tamaki with sly looks in their eyes that Haruhi didn't like at all.

"Waaaiiiiiiit!" Haruhi shouted. Everyone froze in their actions. "I didn't agree."

At once, Hunny had whipped on a "PLEASE GO PLEASE" look and the twins pouted. Very cutely.

However, that wasn't what that got to Haruhi.

It was, of course, Tamaki Suou's puppy eyes.

Just one look at those eyes was all it would take to melt Haruhi's heart. And just about everyone else's, too, actually.

"All right, I'll go," she relented, and Hunny continued making her bounce around the room with him.

"But my father won't really be pleased," Haruhi added, as an afterthought.

"I'll send for him to visit you at least once a week," Kyouya said automatically, opening his notebook to scribble in it again.

"Ah- no, it's okay. Won't it be better if I didn't go?" Haruhi stated, trying to get Hunny to stop bouncing her around the room.

"It's okay," Kyouya said, turning to look her in the eye. "I'm sure an air ticket a week wouldn't matter to my family." He gave her a dazzling smile.

_Damn rich bastards_, Haruhi thought wryly, but there was nothing she could do about it. Come to think about it, there wasn't much that she really _wanted_ to do about it.

--

_It's excellent that Haruhi's going to France with us, _Tamaki thought, his happy, pleasant thoughts bubbling in his head. _Now she'll get to meet my mum. I'm sure my mum would like her._

Ever since Éclair Tonnere and Tamaki's failed trip to France (thanks to Haruhi, and this was meant absolutely sincerely with no hint of sarcasm whatsoever), the arranged engagement was broken off, and Éclair had somewhat reformed her previously cold and calculative character. She had persuaded Tamaki's grandmother into letting him visit his mother every holiday.

_Yes, I can see it all now,_ Tamaki thought contentedly. _Maman will see Haruhi as a brilliant daughter of mine._

-Tamaki's Inner Mind Theatre-

Tamaki and everyone in the host club ran towards a cosy little cottage tucked away in a small street. They rang the doorbell, and a woman looked out.

"_Maman_!" Tamaki cried in joy. He ran towards his mother.

"Tamaki!" Aurore Doucet squealed in surprise, giving him a hug and a kiss. "How are you? And who are all these people."

"We're the Host Club, _mademoiselle_," Kyouya said politely, introducing everyone.

"You're a very pretty girl," Aurore observed, speaking to Haruhi.

It was then Tamaki looked at Haruhi with more attention. She was wearing a light blue dress in Oriental style with some blue flowers in her hair. Tamaki's breath caught in his throat. She'd never looked more beautiful to him.

"It would do well if you and Tamaki were going to marry to each other," Aurore continued, pulling Haruhi into a hug. "I can see that you both care for each other."

"I do care for him," Haruhi said in a whisper, turning to smile the most gorgeous smile at Tamaki.

-End of show in Tamaki's Inner Mind Theatre-

"Milord, are you feeling okay?" Hikaru said, passing his hand over Tamaki's dreamy stare at the ceiling.

"He sure looks contented," Hunny said cheerfully.

"I do!" Tamaki suddenly yelled. His yell brought him back to earth.

"You do what?" asked Kyouya unconcernedly.

"I do… er… I do exercises!" Tamaki came up with an excuse, and immediately felt like sinking through the floor. It was so lame!

"Just like _I_ do mine!" Hunny agreed innocently.

Tamaki thanked his lucky stars for his senior's awareness, or rather the lack of it.

"Anyway, milord, we were just deciding on the various places to visit while in France," Haruhi told the slightly disorientated Host Club president.

"Seeing as you were born in France, perhaps you could give us an idea on where to go," Kyouya said, fountain pen in hand poised over a notebook.

"Oh, sure," Tamaki said cheerfully, and sat at the head of the table. He thought back to his little daydream and gave a little smile. Was this trip going to be great or great!


	2. Chapter 2

"What do you bring for a three-week holiday in France?" Haruhi said to herself, staring at the clothes in her wardrobe. She'd waited till the day of the flight to France before starting to pack, as her fickle father might change his mind about letting her go. But he never did, claiming it'd give her "exposure that he couldn't afford". She had kissed him goodbye that morning, and had immediately begun packing. And now she was regretting about packing it literally at the last minute.

She slowly examined the collection of clothes in her cupboard, finally deciding on eight tee-shirts, a few Bermudas, three pair of jeans, some underwear, and a gown in case there was going to be a formal dinner or something.

_And now, _she thought, _some toiletries._ She had just begun to stuff shampoo and soap bottles into her luggage when the doorbell rang.

_Shoot,_ Haruhi thought, trudging to the door to open it. As expected, everyone in the Host Club was outside. Tamaki, who was right in front of her, was smiling so wide his mouth resembled a banana. Looking at the diametre of his smile, Haruhi's own mouth hurt.

"Er, hi," she said, raising an eyebrow at what they were wearing.

What they were wearing were French medieval styled costumes, the ones last worn at the Carnival That Was Never Meant To Be.

"_Bonjour_," Tamaki chirped happily, as he and the rest trooped in.

"Are you done packing?" Kaoru asked.

"Well, no," Haruhi confessed. "But we aren't late, are we?"

"Oh, no, we aren't late at all," Kyouya smirked. "The plane leaves at twelve noon."

Haruhi turned to check the clock, and sucked in her breath. It read ten o' clock.

"Sorry, gotta run!" she said to the rest before dashing to her room and throwing her brush, and other stuff in.

"Haru-chan, we'll all help you!" Hunny said happily, as the rest of the Club followed her.

Haruhi was all too aware of the few underwear that had dropped onto the floor from her drawer when she'd taken out some to put into her luggage. "Don't come in—" she began, whirling around, but it was too late. The whole club was inside her bedroom.

"What are these?" Tamaki asked in a puzzled voice, walking over to the underwear pile and picking one of Haruhi's panties out. He stared at the bear imprinted piece of clothing for a while, while all the air went out of Haruhi as she slid to the floor, covering her brilliantly red face. Then Tamaki finally realised what it was. He blushed furiously and dropped the undergarment as if it were a red-hot poker.

By now, the rest of the Club was hooting with laughter, except for Mori senpai, whose eyes just held the smallest glimmer of humour, and for Kyouya senpai, whose mouth had formed a little smirk.

"S-sorry, Haruhi," Tamaki stammered. "I didn't know what _that_ was—"

"It's all right," Haruhi said briskly, removing her still magenta face from her hands as she got up and gathered the piled of underwear from the floor and stuffed them back into the drawer with as much dignity she could muster. "What's done is done." She glanced at the club. Hunny senpai was already subdued, but the Hitachiin twins were still gasping with mirth, holding onto one another for support. She threw them a dirty look.

"Are you finished with everything?" Kyouya asked.

"Almost," Haruhi said, grabbing a ballpoint pen and a piece of paper. Hurriedly she scrawled a note:

_Dear _Ojiisan,

_I've left for France with my friends. Take care while I'm gone. Kyouya Ootori, the club's vice-president, is going to send you weekly tickets to France, so you can visit me at least a day a week. I'm going to miss you and home._

_Love from_

_Haruhi_

She stuck the note to the refrigerator and then locked her luggage. "Okay, now we can go," she told them.

"Not yet," Hikaru stopped her.

"Why?" Haruhi asked, nonplussed.

Kaoru took out a French medieval dress from behind his back. That dress was not the same as the one Haruhi wore at the Carnival, it was more elaborate and much more beautiful.

_How did he hide it?_ Haruhi wondered, but had no time to ponder over it; the dress was shoved into her arms, and she was shoved into the toilet in no time.

"What the-?" she exclaimed aloud. Kyouya's voice sounded through the door.

"Change into it quickly," he ordered impatiently, "or we'll be late for the plane. Booking seats for all of us was a hassle you know, and I don't want to have to redo it all over again."

_Usually people will think that missing the plane would be a waste of money,_ thought Haruhi, _but for these guys, oh _no_! It's the booking that they're complaining about. They really have to set their priorities straight._

She reluctantly changed out of her clothing into her costume, wrinkling her nose slightly at its weight.

"Are you done?" Hikaru called.

"I feel obscenely overweight," Haruhi said aloud.

"Just come out," Kaoru insisted.

"Yeah, Haru-chan! We want to see how you look like in your dress!" chirped Hunny.

Haruhi opened the door silently.

"Wow!" Hunny smiled. "Haru-chan, you look so adorable!"

Hikaru and Kaoru both wolf-whistled, Mori nodded, and even Kyouya wore an appreciative look on his face as he observed her. Tamaki had turned rosy pink in the cheeks and was speechless. Literally.

Haruhi, not used to the attention, blushed.

At once all the Hosts (well, apart from Mori and Kyouya, that is) swarmed over her, pinching her cheeks, ruffling her hair, cooing, "So cute!" and "Oh my gosh, can you ever resist that cute blush!"

Haruhi ducked under the arms of her seniors and classmates and said, "All right, can we go now?"

"We _have_ to go now," Kyouya said, "or we'll be late."

--

An hour later, the limousine deposited six boys and one girl outside the Japan airport. If the passers-by looked in more closely (not that they didn't, the costumes were eye-catching and everyone gawked appreciatively at the eye-candies), they could see that Tamaki, Mori, and Haruhi looked scared out of their wits.

"What was with that chauffeur?" exclaimed Tamaki, leaning against a pillar and gasping for breath.

"I didn't know cars were capable of _that_ speed," Haruhi said in a plaintive sort of voice that betrayed her fear with ease. "How close to supersonic did we get?"

Mori, as usual, said nothing, but this time it was because he was afraid that _things _that were better left unseen might spill out of his mouth as soon as he opened it.

"We had to go that fast," said Kyouya, who was the most unruffled looking of them all. "Or would you rather miss the plane?"

"That was a really fun ride," Hunny told the limousine chauffeur, who was unloading the luggage. "Thank you!"

"It was absolutely, dastardly—" began Hikaru, eyes gleaming.

"—fantastically, devilishly the fastest car we've been on," continued Kaoru. "Think we could—"

"—buy it, sir?" finished Hikaru.

"Sorry, but that car's one of my father's favourites," Kyouya interrupted the chauffeur before he could reply. Just then, the chauffeur had finished unloading all the luggage onto trolleys.

The whole club went to their respective trolleys, Tamaki, Haruhi and Mori having recovered a little. Hunny was desperately trying to push his trolley, but then Mori scooped him up onto his shoulders, and started to push both his and Hunny's trolleys.

"Thank you, Takashi!" Hunny smiled happily as he hugged Mori from behind.

Girls all around turned to stare at the seven of them, each of them going giggly at one of the six boy hosts, and all of them turning envious looks on the oblivious Haruhi. The oblivious Haruhi was too busy trying to walk and not trip in the dress.

"Need any help, Haruhi?" asked Tamaki cheerfully.

"If you think you could," replied Haruhi, not really listening. She had found a way to walk without tripping. _Take a small, mincing step,_ she told herself. _One, two, one, two— aaaargh!_

No, that "aaaargh" was not the result of a trip.

"What are you doing? Put me down!" Haruhi struggled in the Host Club leader's arms.

Some of the girls swooned in jealousy.

"You're lagging," Tamaki told her as he transferred her to the top of her luggage. "It'd be faster if I push both your trolley and mine."

"Oh," Haruhi said. "Thank you, then." Tamaki looked as though he wished her response were more like Hunny's. Naturally, Haruhi didn't notice. "But I still wish that you hadn't made me wear that ridiculous dress."

"Ridiculous?" Tamaki asked, aghast. "But this dress makes you look so regally gorgeous! My daughter's the envy of all girls!"

"I feel like a blue whale," Haruhi retorted.

Tamaki was about to reply when Kyouya, who was leading the rest, turned back to call, "If you two don't hurry then we will board the plane leaving you two behind!"

And that left Tamaki no choice but to push the two trolleys while running at breakneck speed, at the same time sneaking glances at the Oblivious Haruhi sitting on her luggage.


End file.
